billowing joy

She sat crouching with her back against the cold, hard wall. A white sheet was pulled over her head and hung limply, coming to rest just beyond her feet. The fabric rippled gently with every breath she took, and she waited patiently in the cold silence of the apartment. Then, deep from beneath the floorboards, an eruption of air escaped the vent between Madelyn's feet. She shrieked, catching the flapping sheet sent sailing through the air. She quickly repositioned her shelter and secured it to the ground with her hands and feet. Laughing, she marveled at the dome of air that formed around her. The warmth seemed to penetrate her frozen limbs and she heaved a great sigh. A muted light fell through the cover. Her eyelids soon began to droop. But the air began to turn colder and gradually, ceased to blow. The billowing sheet fell, again coming to rest atop Madelyn's head. She could feel the warmth leaving. Her muscles tightened and her toes curled.
Lifting the drape from her face, Madelyn stared at the door. The faint clamor of hurried foot steps echoed in the hallway outside. The noise grew closer and closer until, finally, it seemed as though the person were right outside her doorway. The footsteps stopped. Her heart began to race. A silent white light flashed through the room followed by the earsplitting scream of the fire alarm. The footsteps picked up again, but this time in a run. Plugging her ears, Madelyn started toward the door, planning to head downstairs. As she rose to go, however, a smile broke across her face. Grabbing her coat from the foot of her bed, she pivoted toward the nearest window. In screeching defiance the pane slid open, and Madelyn stepped out onto the fire escape. The morning air was not much colder than that inside, but she shivered as the thin metal shifted beneath her weight. Rounding the corners of the spiraling stair, she imagined an escape from a murderous captor, skipping steps as she jumped along. A grasping hand stretched out to tear her dress, inches away. With frightening speed, the ladder swung Madelyn towards the ground. Landing heavily, she regained her balance on the slick surface and reveled in her evasion.
The residents of the apartment building had formed in a mob outside the front entrance, and as Madelyn approached, she could hear the disquiet among her neighbors. Offered with a strong waft of liquor, a bystanding woman breathed, "Some goddamned kid..."

cement ocean

The first snowflakes of winter began to fall toward the frozen earth that morning with silent determination. Tiny white birds gliding into a gray ocean of pavement and cement. Heaving the door to her apartment building aside, an icy gust flooded Madelyn’s face, watering her eyes and catching her briefly off guard. Bowing her head to the biting wind, she gripped her coat tightly shut, not bothering to fumble with the buttons in the short walk to work. Out of old habit she counted the cracks in the sidewalk and avoided them with widening steps. Passing the doors of a gaudy day care building, Madelyn caught a glimpse of smiling faces giggling in innocent bliss. The corners of her mouth twitched noticeably, but she didn’t smile.
Warm light bathed the pavement ahead, and mirrored the square windowpanes of the salon storefront down the block. Madelyn left her thoughts only to quicken her pace. Ten minutes she said aloud. At this self-acknowledgement, she grinned. Ten minutes to get ready and walk to work had to be a personal record, she thought. Each morning, Madelyn fumbled through the dark of her room, somehow piecing together an outfit from the heap of clothes carpeting the floor. Her refusal to be comfortably early led to quite a disheveled appearance, though this grunge seemed to suit her.
The bell on the door jingled as it shut behind her, and her boss looked up from where she stood, sweeping. Noting Madelyn’s unkempt hair, Lauren frowned, but without words, ushered the girl into a salon chair. Holding several hair pins between her teeth, Lauren began work on the untamed waves of hair, pinning the dark tresses in various places.

“God, you smell like a bar,” she laughed

From behind her fallen bangs, Madelyn didn’t respond. Her eyes went in and out of focus as she gazed at her reflection in front of her.

“Hah. Yea, it was a pretty rough night," she finally replied, her sudden grin fading as the words past her lips.

The day went by in a haze. People came and went, their constant chatter filling the shop. Madelyn had other things on her mind, however, and as she ran her fingers through soapy hair and felt the heat of the blow drier, she imagined foaming bubble baths with rubber ducks and the beating summer sun in the South. She was standing on the end of a wobbling diving board when Lauren’s voice dispelled her vivid memories. Sitting in her own salon chair, Madelyn realized that she had been lost in thought for quite some time. She glanced out the window in sudden confusion and saw that the winter sky had grown very dark. Lauren told her she looked like hell. And with these words, the lights in the shop flickered. Locking eyes, Madelyn caught a glimpse of fear in Lauren’s features before the room went black. Cursing, Lauren shuffled about the room. She appeared across the shop, a candle illuminating her face. Looking on, Madelyn briefly watched as she groped around in the dim light before slipping out of her seat.
In the back alley moments later, Madelyn flinched at the crunching snow under her high heel boots. Shivering slightly, she searched the deep pockets of her coat. Withdrawing a box, she hurriedly packed the cigarettes against her open palm. Madelyn delighted in the glowing flame that shone in the surrounding darkness. In a deep drag she sank against the brick wall behind her. Exhaling, she closed her eyes.
The turbulent air licked at Madelyn’s exposed face and the hair on the back of her neck stood. From far down the alley, she heard the faint dissonance of clanking bottles. Shivering at the noise, an unsettling flutter arose in her gut. Squinting through the fading light, Madelyn surveyed the reaches of her surroundings. For a few silent moments, she strained her ears in the deafening silence. Somewhere far away, a dog howled into the evening sky. She quickly stood to go, flicking her barely-smoked cigarette into the blanket of powder. Madelyn shoved the door open, and with one last glance, peered down the alleyway. She froze. A dark figure was now visible beyond the nearest dumpster. A man stepped from the shadow, and with a sharp gasp, Madelyn slipped inside, her heart racing. The heavy locks clicked into place as she ground them forcefully shut. Striding toward the warm candlelight of the shop, Madelyn held her hands up before her. Clenching her fists, she could still feel the violent trembling of her frozen fingers.